Why Please and Thank You Matter

Long before kindergarten, I was taught the importance of saying please and thank you. How about you?

This was to prepare me for the new world of school and life in general to interact with others in a proper way.

I won’t forget my mom and dad teaching how to ask for something, and what to say after it was given. This foundational idea taught me to respect others, and to be thankful. 

This has helped me in so many ways, and more than ever, I believe families are healthier when they have a culture of saying please and thank you. 

What has surprised me about being around my kids’ sports teams, friends and schools, I’ve noticed the rise in disrespect, and the lack of saying please and thank you. This perpetuates entitlement and selfishness, and these two things lead to disaster. 

I believe no one owes us anything, and when we have a please and thank you attitude, it fosters thankfulness for what we have and for what others are giving. There’s something about respecting others and ourselves that gives a path for success in life. 

There’s also something about respecting what God does that opens our heart to move closer to him. 

This is what David said,

“2. Let all that I am praise the Lord; may I never forget the good things he does for me. 3. He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases. 4. He redeems me from death and crowns me with love and tender mercies. 5. He fills my life with good things. My youth is renewed like the eagle’s!”

Psalms‬ ‭103:2-5‬

David respected what God did for him, which caused him to praise God, move closer to him, and say thank you.

This is a pattern for our lives and for our families.

We’re better when we say please and thank you. We’re better when we’re humble, work hard and have a hustle in our step.

We’re vulnerable when we’re entitled, prideful, and when we think it’s automatic. This is when we get in trouble, and when we shut our hearts off to God and to others.

Today, God has done so much for us that we can say please and thank you daily for the rest of our lives, and it still wouldn’t cover everything he’s done. 

So, what if we take this posture and lead our families with it?

Just think about our families’ culture by asking for both big and small things with humility and saying please, and our families saying thank you for what they have. Wouldn’t our homes be better? Wouldn’t our homes have more peace? I think so!

Moreover, I believe our homes would show love to each other, because when we say please and thank you, it puts us in a right place with others. 

This is what happened to David when he remembered all the things God did for him. His soul praised God and his perspective and posture was healthy and humble.

Isn’t this what we want for our families?

Of course! So, what do we do?

First, we choose to train ourselves and our kids to say please and thank you as a way of life, not just for a moment.

This must be instilled in them as a part of who they are, no matter where they are.

Second, lead them to affirm each other in front of the family. There’s something about using words to love and build up each other that helps have a humble and giving culture in the home. 

This fosters real talk, which is needed to be healthy.

Third, lead the family to be thankful for what they have. When we’re thankful for what we have, we’ll say please in what we’re asking for. We’ll also respect what we have, and we’ll learn to value it by keeping it nice and in order. 

There’s something about being thankful that heals our hearts, attitudes, and perspective. Conversely, when we’re unthankful in our hearts, attitudes and perspective gets tangled up in what we don’t have, and that’s never good.

There’s value in saying please and thank you. In fact, it’s bigger than what we know, and its ripple will touch every aspect of our lives. 

So, I encourage you to lead your family as a please and thank you home. When we do this to God and to others, we’ll be better, and our families will be better too!

God bless you and have a great day.

Thank you for reading this blog,

PD